Results are tomorrow. Finally. It's also my birthday. I kinda feel like results are stealing my birthday from me because I don't really care that it's my birthday anymore, I mean the fact that I'm getting my results kind of just kills everything... I guess birthdays aren't really all that important. But I do enjoy making a big deal out of birthdays, I'm not sure why. I guess it's an excuse to do stupid shit to people (like blindfold them and make them walk around holding helium balloons, which is a personal favourite of mine) and make them feel like good or whatever. Which you don't exactly need an excuse for, but like yeah. It's there.
I don't really wanna turn 17. I think it's a weird, neither-here-nor-there kind of age. I've told so many people this like I really don't mind just staying 16 forever. I don't wanna grow old. Don't really wanna grow up either. But I guess I don't have much of a choice...
I'm kind of scared for results because I really don't know what to expect but at the same time, I'm not that scared because I've kind of figured out what I want to do, like in relation to whatever score I get. So yeah I'm kind of fine with anything so it just depends on that damning number that will appear on the bottom of that slip that I'll be receiving from Mr Chua and oh my gosh I am kind of really scared arghdfjkhslrhskj.
Went to the ACJC and NJ open houses today and I'm not entirely sure if I even want to go to a JC, if my score allows me to... But I'm going to stick to my original plan because I believe that everything will work out either way, because it's all part of a greater plan for my life and stuff, yes.
One of the feelings I really detest would be regret so I guess that's what I'm most afraid of. I don't think I'll regret not studying because I don't want to regret not studying but I might regret not studying because, well, I didn't study. Yeah. But I did study. So I don't have any regrets. Yeah. Okay.
I kinda just wanna be a kid again. Look at how happy I was.
Okay but I guess the past 17 years have been pretty okay. Like I've been really blessed and I have so much to be grateful for so I shouldn't be complaining. Yes. So I shan't. BUT I STILL DON'T WANNA BE 17 I DON'T WANNA BE OLD NO GAH bye